So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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