he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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