My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
