Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
