i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
