There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
