so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
