I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Enjoy the penises
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
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