Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
