she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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