I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
