Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Randomize
