I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
