Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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