p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
