What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
