No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
