I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
How's work?
Spinning.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
