I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Ladies don't puke and tell
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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