O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Randomize
