@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
ttyl tear gas
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
