I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
