let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
