ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
