with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
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