Having a random hookup so left but love u
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
