we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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