Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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