Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Randomize
