Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
