yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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