So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
