Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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