I wish I could teleport
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
