There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
