cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
