my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
