I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
You are the jesus of drinking
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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