I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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