Whod you bang
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Randomize
