Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
