he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
He has the fingertips of a God
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