i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
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