I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Bring me that man meat
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
