im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
