This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
The Olympian is in my bed
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
