Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
