dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
