You're completely useless in the revolution.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize