I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
